Dear Old Valpo

Just got back from being at my alma mater, Valparaiso University for a few days. I am on the National Council for the business school which meets twice a year, once being around Homecoming. This is the first year in a while that I have actually stayed for some of the Homecoming festivities. The theme was "Proud to Come Home". I think that was an excellent theme because I am truly proud to have a heritage with Valpo. While each year that passes brings separation from my years, there is still definitely a sense of community and pride I feel when I come back. It still feels like home.

I attended a building dedication. A sense of pride came upon me. Valpo has more new buildings I think in the past 34 years than old buildings. And the quality is stellar. But the cornerstone of the Valparaiso campus is the Chapel of the Resurrection, the tallest collegiate chapel in North America. It is still a testament to the fact that this university is a faith based university. I learned that Valpo was ranked number one by Washington Monthly as the best university of the county in giving to the public good. There is definitely a sense that Valpo students and faculty make a difference.

I chatted with Cornell Boggs, one of my fraternity brothers who was named one of the 100 most influential black leaders in corporate America. We long to identify with a team that is effective. 

I stopped by and watched the women's softball game. A man came up to me and started talking about the team. I immediately recognized him as Rod Moore, the head athletic trainer. I know this because Rod was the head trainer when I wrestled at Valpo from 78-80. What was even more amazing is Rod said he remembered me. Rod is one of those Dick Clark guys who never seems to look older than when you knew him. Anyway, I chatted with Rod for a while and my conversation reinforced a sense of belonging.

I walked down by a series of exhibits where my fraternity had an exhibit. I recognized a young man's face. The president of the university is the son of my former roommate who lives in the Cleveland area. The next generation is now represented on campus. Again, a sense of pride welled up within me.

As human beings we long for community. We long to be a part of something special. We long to feel that sense of pride and accomplishment. It is how we are wired. We are not to be human islands. My trek to Valpo was much more than a stroll down memory lane. It served to reinforce my longing for purpose, for community.

The Written Word is Better

When we were at this wedding a few weeks ago, included in the invitation were written directions to the reception which was about 10-15 minutes away. The reception was on CoolSprings Church Road. My opinion at the time - written directions are stupid in an age of technology.

Easy enough - rather than follow the written directions, I will use technology. I plotted it on my GPS and we merrily go on our way following the GPS lady's directions. Until we get fairly far enough out of town and Deb says - "Where are you going?" I said CoolSprings Church Road and she says something like "this doesn't look right".  I look at my GPS and I had fat-fingered CoolSprings Road as Cook Springs Church Road. Now we are in the middle of nowhere and somehow the GPS is trying to direct me to this place called Cook Springs Road which I don't think exists.

No harm, no foul. I put the correct directions in the GPS and we get back on track. Until we see a sign that tells us that we are at the intersection of CoolSprings Church Road and, uh, CoolSprings Church Road (see the picture). I guess you just don't have enough CoolSprings Church Roads in this part of Pennsylvania. Again, we ignore the written direction and turn right and at least follow the signs. Besides, two different cars ahead of us also turn right. It became quickly apparent this was wrong as we are in the middle of somebody's farm.So we go back to the intersection and notice a sign that says "Hulisz Wedding Straight Ahead 3 miles". Again, printed directions for our benefit. Finally, after numerous detours, we arrive at the reception.


This little adventure reminds me of how we neglect the written, printed word of God. I am referring to the Bible. 2 Tim. 3:16 tells us it is literally God breathed. Somehow we rationalize that it is out of date and we live in an enlightened age. Or we may tell ourselves that it isn't for this particular situation, that it doesn't apply. The written word is for our own good - not because God hates us but because God loves us. The world sends confusing signals (like our confusing sign) and we follow them like lemmings to the sea. My default mode was my own way. The GPS is better because it is cool technology and I basically tell it where to go and it sends me (I can hear the voice of my 85 year old dad telling me the GPS is not to be trusted).

The Bible is timeless in its application. Yes, it was written in a specific time and space and in a particular culture. But it is every bit as relevant to us today as it was then. And it won't steer me wrong. It shows me myself and it shows me my Savior. It shows me how to live and who to live for. It can be trusted.

The Covenant of Marriage

There has been an unusual number of weddings this summer. We personally will have six of them and then Deb as a marriage coordinator I think has something like nine. We went to a wonderful one yesterday with a couple that we mentored. As marital mentors, we go through 6-8 fairly intensive weeks of material. We are very frank with them. Marriage isn't a bed of roses and there are struggles. Our first ten years of marriage were brutal. We had all sorts of baggage. Well, why didn't we pack it in (pun intended)? It was because of the marriage covenant.

We sign all sorts of contracts in life. I have a lease sitting on my desk that requires a notary public. I have to find someone who is trained to observe and signature and attest to the same. The wedding ceremony is a ratification before witnesses of a contract. Well, why does it matter? Lots of people say well if we love each other and are committed to each other, isn't that good enough? Short answer - no! A contractual covenant is still vital because it says before God and witnesses that we are fully committed to it. It more than matters - it is essential.

What preserved our marriage was a commitment to the contractual covenant. And a strange thing happened over time. God knit our hearts together. Things that were obstacles for the bad became differences for the good. The things about Deb that annoyed me (why can't she be more like me?), now I can celebrate with full earnestness.

There is a term for covenant love. It is the word "agape" which is the love of Christ for His church. It is unconditional love. Most business contracts are bi-lateral which means both sides have to deliver their bill of the goods. Some people see that as the 50-50 marriage. But the marriage contract is unilateral. It requires nothing of the other person. I have to love that person regardless of what that person does. Again God does the work because if both are committed to agape love, you get not the 50-50 marriage but the 300% marriage which is 1+1=3.

Welcome Michael and Shelley to this wonderful covenant!  May God truly bless your new union.