Food Poisoning, Part II

Thankfully, I am now recovered fully from the bout of food poisoning that I blogged about last week. I am not going to belabor this topic too much, but I feel there is one more side-note to this sorry saga. I knew pretty much immediately that I had eaten something that did not agree with me. I had a soup and salad and it was likely the soup that got me but the salad was the second thing I ate and even now, the thought of a Waldorf Salad skives me out. When I had food poisoning once before, we suspect it was a sandwich from Panera but it was cupcakes that skived me out then because it was the last thing I ate before all rumblings broke loose (you know what I mean).

Sometimes root issues manifest themselves to the second one in line. I may have a particularly bad day and I take it out on those closest to me. They are not the cause; they are simply the burden carrier. We know we can be transparent with them and sometimes they take the fall because they are just there in the aftermath. I know there are many times where I take my own baggage onto Deb (today is her birthday by the way) even though she is far from being the cause of my own frustration. My Waldorf salad was an innocent bystander of my contamination. A by-product of relationships is this diffusion of the stain of sin. I could be having the roughest of times but I know I have relationships that just seem to ease the problems.

Deb and I watched the movie "Fences" last night and Rose (Viola Davis) is a perfect example of this type of relationship.  Troy, (Denzel Washington) to whom she is married to is often despicable. He is always having bad days as he bemoans what he could have been and time and time again. Yet she is there for him even as he remains a despicable character. God has wired us for relationship even knowing we bear burdens of others.

I Like You

My wife and I have a strange, but nice pattern where when we encounter each other, we say "I Like You". What we are saying is that we appreciate the strengths and the mutual affection we have for each other. This phrase "I Like You" does not replace love. Love is an act of the will and has nothing to do with the other person. My wife could be completely unresponsive and I would still love her. But in saying "I Like You", I am saying I appreciate all that is contained in her being. This is consistent with the words for love in the bible. The word agape refers to the unconditional love, the covenant commitment love whereas phileo refers to brotherly affection or the Greek word equivalent of like.

I have started to use my Fitbit more. The other day I realized something. After I charge the Fitbit up fully, it flashes on the screen "I Like You". Wow, I did not realize my Fitbit likes me. I could sit on my lazy butt for weeks on end and after I charge my Fitbit, it will still say "I Like You". That is not agape love or phileo love, but self-love. The programmers of the Fitbit software (it's always the software) figured out that we better put motivational concepts in or people will get discouraged or apathetic.

It got my thinking how many people confuse self-love with brotherly love, or even worse with covenant love. Self love can never stand alone. The bible says to "let another praise you and not your own mouth" (Proverbs 27:2). I can come up with all my own motivational statements all day long but in the end, I must have someone else to admire something in me, even when I am a complete screw-up. God has wired us to long for the affection and admiration of others. It is part of what keeps us in relationship.