I Like You

My wife and I have a strange, but nice pattern where when we encounter each other, we say "I Like You". What we are saying is that we appreciate the strengths and the mutual affection we have for each other. This phrase "I Like You" does not replace love. Love is an act of the will and has nothing to do with the other person. My wife could be completely unresponsive and I would still love her. But in saying "I Like You", I am saying I appreciate all that is contained in her being. This is consistent with the words for love in the bible. The word agape refers to the unconditional love, the covenant commitment love whereas phileo refers to brotherly affection or the Greek word equivalent of like.

I have started to use my Fitbit more. The other day I realized something. After I charge the Fitbit up fully, it flashes on the screen "I Like You". Wow, I did not realize my Fitbit likes me. I could sit on my lazy butt for weeks on end and after I charge my Fitbit, it will still say "I Like You". That is not agape love or phileo love, but self-love. The programmers of the Fitbit software (it's always the software) figured out that we better put motivational concepts in or people will get discouraged or apathetic.

It got my thinking how many people confuse self-love with brotherly love, or even worse with covenant love. Self love can never stand alone. The bible says to "let another praise you and not your own mouth" (Proverbs 27:2). I can come up with all my own motivational statements all day long but in the end, I must have someone else to admire something in me, even when I am a complete screw-up. God has wired us to long for the affection and admiration of others. It is part of what keeps us in relationship.