A Legacy of Physical and Spiritual Birth

My father-in-law, Donald Stephen Amsler went to be with his Lord and Savior Monday night, November 18, 2013.  The time he was in the hospital suffering from various ailments till the time he went home in eternity was less than 10 days.  Thus, we are still reeling by this loss but gratified to know that he loved Jesus and is now with him.  Debsue left a loving tribute on her blog.

Papa, as he was affectionately called by both his children and grandchildren, left a unique legacy.  I had the privilege of knowing him 30 years and here on my 54th birthday today, I am so thankful that I knew him more than half of my life.  I am still shocked that he is gone.  But I have had some time to ponder his unique legacy and the fact that he touched so many lives in so many different ways.  As a obstetrician-gynecologist, he brought literally thousands of babies into the world.  The weirdest experience I can recall is when we had our landscaper in Ohio working on a project.  His mother (who was his office manager) had stopped over to pick up some paperwork.  At the time, Papa and Mimi were visiting and they struck up a conversation.  She recollected that her son (mid 20's) was born in Hinsdale, IL where Papa practiced and that she thought the physician was from the same practice as Papa.  This prompted her to find the birth certificate where the attending physician was, guess who?  This prompted a typical Papa response that "Pete hadn't changed a bit".  

Papa had an all business attitude in medicine and in life.  He could be very intimidating to an insecure young 25 year old (which I think finally went away by say age 50).  He did not mean to be intimidating.  He just was one of those guys who knew practically everything and was almost always in charge.  I, on the other hand, held a deep knowledge of only a few things and the two things I knew virtually nothing about were medicine and home maintenance.  I am sure that was a frustration to him, especially home maintenance.  He sometimes would be frustrated by what was natural to him, but very foreign to me.  But over time, he seemed to accept my inabilities and developed a common conversation between us, usually centered on computers.  That seemed to fit his love of gadgetry and his desire to form a bond with his son-in-law.  He loved to tell me of every shareware product that he was aware of that did everything like make toast.  He assumed I knew all this stuff, but as usual he held more knowledge than the guy who worked in software.  But I greatly appreciated his desire to relate to me.

Debsue left a legacy to her dad on the airwaves a few years ago.  Bill Bennett articulated on his Morning in America show Deb's "prayer" for her dad.  


He was an intense man until the past 10 or so years as he slowed down to retirement.  Because he was used to being in charge, it was sometimes difficult for him to not accept something that did not fit his expectations.  There are a number of stories of him doing some things that were a tad embarrassing because he could not wait or because he expected some result that fell below his expectations.  Some of us manifest things in different ways and he didn't do these things because he felt he was better than others, but because he had this innate sense of taking charge.  He graduated high school at 16 and took charge every since.  This was perceived as a hard edge by some.

But there is no doubt that this man had a soft side and an empathetic side to him that only became more apparent as he got older.  He was incredibly supportive of my entrepreneurial bent including financially.  He was a very giving man who was constantly showering us as a young couple with gifts.  Early in my married life, I resented (believe it or not) his desire to give gifts.  Later in life, I came to take it for granted.  He passed on his gift giving to my kids, his grandchildren.  Two of our kids went to Wheaton College which was a stones throw away.  Papa was always there for them.  He watched out for them, supported them, and made them feel so loved.  When Bethany had her car issues last year, we did not hesitate to ask him and he immediately went and got her on the tollway.  No questions asked!

He had a wonderful sense of humor.  The running joke was whether we could make it through mealtime without eventually talking about or demonstrating air emanating from either orifice (I think it was all a medical enlightening to the accountant in the room).  His sense of humor was there all the way till the end of his life.  Debbie and I are so grateful that we got to see him last weekend as painful as it was.  He was in excruciating pain the last week of his life.  However, that did not stop his dry sense of humor.  When the doctor stopped in to see him, he asked who we were because he had not seen us.  So Deb introduced herself as "daughter" and I introduced myself as "son-in-law" and he felt compelled to introduce himself under an oxygen mask as "patient".   Another time he asked Mimi for a glass of water as she was cleaning out the phlegm that he had expended from a container.  Mimi asked him if he wanted warm or cold (meaning water) to which he said "boogers are always warm".

But I am most amazed by his faith.  We don't know all that is going on in a person and I have to admit that I have thought at points in time over 30 years that he had a shallow faith (never doubting his belief in Jesus).  I could not have been more wrong.  He was a man of very strong faith who passed on that legacy to his children and grandchildren.  People are now coming out of the woodwork because of how this man touched their lives.  Some of us are even more missed as when we depart this side of eternity.  I suspect that we will see much of the fruit that Papa bore on this earth when we talk to folks in heaven.  There is much behind the scenes that even now we are learning about.  Then finally, there is how much he is already missed.  I can't believe he is gone and I so much want one more chance to tell him how much I loved him and appreciated him.  My kids have done that for me on my birthday today and I wish I could tell him again.  But I will see him again and we will have a joyous reunion.

I remember two years ago Thanksgiving a Papa prayer.  I combed through the archives and found it and have reproduced it below.  It was very typical Papa - well thought through and from the heart.


Jesus asked Nicodemus about being "born again".  Nicodemus thought entirely of physical birth.  Don Amsler had a true perspective of the duality of physical and spiritual birth.  He got it and he lived it.  We are again reminded that life is brief and we only get one chance to get it right.  Our legacy is our motivation.  I am very confident that Jesus will be saying to Papa those words we all long to hear "Well done, good and faithful servant". 

Lessons From Job - Part 1

What a week!  First, my father-in-law was admitted to intensive care where he still is after nearly a week.  Second, my uncle and aunt were involved in a severe auto accident and my aunt sustained severe back injuries.  If that weren't all enough, the church where my uncle is a pastor sustained a damaging fire.  As we sit here today, my family is struggling.  We just returned from visiting my father-in-law and it was very sobering and emotional to see such a man who you associate with being so strong and in charge being so frail and helpless. 

I had just finished reading and studying the book of Job.  Normally, I have struggled with reading Job.  It seems to be endless in its back and forth.  It is also a problematic book.  How could God make a cosmic wager with Job?  But my latest foray into Job produced more insight than I have ever experienced before.  I asked God to show me insight into this complicated book.  I wrote down lessons as I went through and have captured a dozen or so that I would like to share with you over several blog posts. It is helpful to sit back from Job and look at it from a 30,000 foot view.

Job is the ultimate example of suffering
Job suffers more than we ever could and thus we could never be in a position than Job to complain to God.  Job lost the three "P's".  He had immense physical resources, which he lost suddenly.  He lost personal relationships with losing his family via tragedy and his friends by rebuke.  He lost his physical body.  Have you lost physical possessions?  Never more than Job.  Lose a close family member?  Job lost his whole family.  Had friends turn on you?  Not like Job.  Lose physical ability? Not more than Job.  I truly believe Job is as strong as it is so we can see a model sufferer, strange as that sounds.

I am very tempted to feel sorry for myself from time to time.  Why is God putting me through the ringer?  Then I see model sufferer - those who I think are suffering and enduring it with grace, not losing their love for Christ.  I even more respect my father-in-law having seen him suffer these past few days with grace and humility.  We saw evidence of his dry sense of humor.  Job is our model sufferer, one that we see coming through out of grace.  Can we suffer as well as Job?

It is ok to complain to God
Job complained and God listened.  I am so thankful for Job's complaints.  Much of the book of Psalms are complaints to God.  The complaints don't abandon the person's faith.  Job's faith in God remained, but he questioned why.  There is much we don't understand because we only see things this side of earth and even then, we can't fully understand what God is doing.  Perhaps there are things going on that we don't see like Job.  We are called to pray and trust.  Not sure how that works itself out, but it does.  God does not reject our complaining.  In the closing chapters of Job, God does not feel free to answer Job's complaints - instead He lays out the vast expanse of His knowledge and creative power.  But he doesn't reject those complaints.  I see heroes of the faith like Paul cry out in their suffering. 

In a strong relationship, there is mutual trust.  I feel 100% free to speak my mind to my wife (hasn't always been that way) and vice-versa. There is dialogue with God, not monologue.   Why do we get angry with our spouse? - because there is love.  Why do we get angry with God? - because there is love.  There couldn't be anger if there wasn't love to start with. 

Guilty of Fiery Hell

Everyone who is angry with his brother shall be guilty before the court and whoever says to his brother, "You good-for-nothing" shall be guilty before the supreme court; and whoever says "You fool", shall be guilty enough to go to fiery hell.
Matthew 5:22

I love to bike ride and since we moved to Brecksville, I am in the biking version of heaven.  We live at the fulcrum of three park systems.  Hundreds of miles of bike paths all within 2-4 miles.  Normally, I don't wear my headphones when I bike ride as it is inhibits listening to traffic.  But if biking on a trail, I didn't see much risk.  So today I put on my headphones and was beep-bopping down the Summit County Bike-n-Hike trail to gospel music.  I was just praising God, occasionally lifting my hands up.  Then there it was ahead - my super pet peeve.  A group walking four across a path oblivious to the fact that a cyclist or even a runner might be passing them.  I feel my blood boil and usually I yell out "On your left" in a very defiant tone. 

So in the midst of my praise, I am yelling "On your left" and there was no movement.  So I yell again "On your left".  I have to slow down (which I hate because you know I am on a timer) to go around them.  So as I go around them, I mutter probably in a voice loud enough for them to hear "Idiot".  I no sooner than I get around them that I start to praise God again.

The Holy Spirit brought that verse to my mind. 

My Lord, how you redeem broken people! I am deeply broken and I know it.  If you knew half of my thoughts, you would never associate with me.  I lust, I crave, I envy, I despise even those closest to me.  I started praying recently that I wouldn't despise my wife.  Now I love my wife and it is zero she has done.  No, even better, I adore my wife.  She is cool beans.  It is me (sounds like a Dear John letter). 

We need to be continually reminded that God has rescued, redeemed us with the most precious gift imaginable, the gift of the broken body and shed blood of the Lord Jesus.  That carries a name - redemption.  And with redemption comes another name - sanctification.  It means that our sin is replaced by the presence of God's Holy Spirit within us.  Not through our own power but through His power. 

If you are not continually reminded of your depravity,  I am not sure you recognize the full power of the Gospel. 

Captain Phillips and African Pirates

Sorry for the long hiatus in blogging.  Sometimes time just gets away from us.  I certainly think frequently about blog topics and jot them down as I go through my day.  However, I definitely have a backlog of blog topics that would give me enough material for at least a year.  I am going to make it my end of the year resolution to be more consistent.  At least that is the intent.

DebSue and I went yesterday to see Captain Phillips.  It is a great movie - rivoting from about a third of the way in till the end.  I was particularly interested in how the movie might portray the pirates.  Would the movie treat them like savages with no real life and no real soul?  Surprisingly, the movie started with their tribal background.  The ringleader was rousted from sleeping and "urged" to go.  There is the youngest one who the film clearly portrays as one who probably shouldn't have been there.  In no way am I trying to justify what they did, but they were real people.

I am reminded of how little we in the west understand developing countries, and in particular Sub-Saharan Africa.  We lump Africa as one massive place together when it is many countries, each with their own identity.  We have been to Rwanda, Uganda, and Ghana, and they all were very different.  I have probably read every book on Rwanda and the complex situation leading up to the genocide of 1994.  How can we possibly imagine where 1/8 of a population is effectively wiped out?  Our daughter Meghan spent four months in Uganda so she was able to see the real deal up close.  It was real surreal to spend an evening with one of Meghan's host families sharing a meal in a small house with no electricity or running water.  But they were real people with real challenges. 

We have to remind ourselves that one third of the world lives on less than $2 a day and are in a daily battle for survival.  And yet some of the strongest Christians - totally sold out for Christ are living in these situations.  It is even harder to imagine a lawless country like Somalia and what occurs there.  There is a point in the movie where Tom Hanks asks the lead pirate why he chose to be a pirate; he indicated there was no other option.  Again, no justification for what they did, but understanding.  I think at the end of the move when three of the pirates were taken out that there was another loss and it wasn't just the excitement over the rescue.  In some way, our emotion was also one of sadness. 

I have to catch myself to say there is no one expendable.  God knows each of us by name and each one of us has value.  Enough value to cost God His Son.